Have Today Off

Have today off. Used to have music playing, always. Used to feel music conducive to my writing. Music held me in whatever that mood was. Useful trick of brain wiring that I've denied myself. Been calling it distraction. Prob'ly a symptom of sick robot-worker mind, ever on the go get'em, 'coz that's the mindset required in that fantasy world.

As I've said, tho, have me a day off. Stepped from the day'jobber's fantasy world. Returned to my own...yesss. Adjusted the bits of my writing cell. Quill scribbling...er, keys clicking, that is. Conjuring words. Trying to. And trying the change of not waiting for the lulls of quiet that might not ever come in this stack of cells, this asylum.

Asylum. So fitting the word. Its meanings, emotional weight. Madhouse. Sanctuary. Seeking that sheltering somewhere, my fave. Hopeful, as ever, me.

Unimportant, the why for my evident grey mood. Private, that. It was black, really. Blood pulsing in the ears. Rage simmering. That should've sent me running. My usual response, rather than stay, rage in response, scare away the muse, the windblown gal in drafty shift the frilly-shirted poets envision hovering at shoulder. Usually I run so I might calm down elsewhere, return eventually to this. But reasoned that in running away I remove myself from doing this very work I need to be at. Stayed, instead. Simmered, even. Jotted down this brown jewel, too. Because all is writing exercise, in the end.

The music, right. The why I'd started this, in my sunnier new morning mood. Leslie Fiest's Honey Honey had just purled over me. Haunting is the word, yes, I remember. Felt perfect for putting me back in that writing place. Haunting. The same as her My Moon My Man.
I was only plotting to add my obvious snark about this, this real music of hers, quite the departure from the nursery rhymes her contract drew from her. The same as from so many other musicians. The ditties that sell cars.

My snark, then, that would only have filled a blog.

Today, then. Things to do. This. Sister email. MyHunt. Pay Shaw. Muichimotsu. GodSeed Vector. Playground. Protag peruse. Map the town in that stalled story, at least some! — name streets —names can be inspiring. Game, some, or a lot, escape. Lunch. Be flexible about the order. Switch on that radio.